Before meeting with your estate planner, make two lists: first draft a detailed list of your assets, if you are not organized, you will waste time organizing paperwork during your office consultation. Secondly, write down what you are trying to achieve: there are many reasons that bring people in for a will or to extend their estate plan. Often, the children are older and it has become clear who and what they are. Perhaps one has a physical disability, and an equal division of assets no longer seems sensible. Also, changes brought by divorce and the new relationships that follow cause estate plan changes. Alternatively, you may need a new estate plan because your wealth has ballooned, either through your good fortune or because you received an inheritance. You are permitted to leave an unlimited amount tax-free to your spouse; however, if you die in 2004 and leave more and 1.5 million dollars to other heirs, the Internal Revenue Service will tax this transfer of assets. You may also need to update your will to reflect the 2001 tax law in which the estate-tax exemption is slated to increase from $1.5 million this year, 2004, to $3.5 million in 2009. The estate tax disappears in 2010, only to return in 2011, with the exemption reverting to $1 million and a 55% estate tax rate .

If you are concerned that your son is not financially responsible, put limits on his spending, your estate planner might recommend placing his inheritance in a trust. Similarly, your planner might suggest using a trust to minimize the hassle of probate. The estate planner should also advise drawing up a durable power of attorney and health-care proxy. A durable power of attorney allows the designated ?attorney in fact? to make financial decisions even if you become incapacitated; and a health-care proxy names somebody to make medical decisions on your behalf.

Finally, your estate planner should talk to you about your retirement accounts, life insurance, and any property you own jointly with right of survivorship. Jointly owned property automatically passes to the survivor, while retirement accounts and insurance policies pass to the beneficiaries named on those accounts ? not withstanding instructions to the contrary as laid out in your estate planning documents. If you never updated your beneficiary designation, your ex-spouse could end up remembering you with surprising fondness!